Bunnyrabbit's diary: +broken jpegs edition+

FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT.

So what if these old blue jeans are really too big? I'm still fat. It makes me sadder to think that I was ever this huge. Today I ate more than I have in the past week. I ate a bowl of noodles, a bagel and a peanut butter sandwich. TOO MUCH!! I swear I'm such an asshole. I can't even diet properly. Do you know how many calories are in a peanut butter sandwich? 235

Noodles? 410

Bagel? 200

845??? CHRIST!!! What the hell is wrong with me? *sobs hysterically* Jesus fucking christ. I feel sick. I almost wish that I would throw up to get whatever remains of that bagel out of me. No wonder I haven't lost any weight. I ate the sandwich because I thought the protein would halp me feel better, but wow, it didn't.

See, I can't really cry because crying causes wrinkles. Although I don't know why I care, it's not like I'm keeping myself wrinkles-free for anyone. It's not like anyone has ever looked at me with anything other than disgusted contempt or half-hearted pity.

You know that feeling when you feel vulnerable and sad and embarrassed and like you're going to cry? That warm tingly feeling in your chest? Yeah, I wish that would go away.

I'm a failure at EVERYTHING. Oh, I know what I'll do...

HAHA!!!! THERE! It's all in the garbage! ALL OF IT! I opened every pack of noodles and threw them in the trash, garbanzo beans, peanut butter scooped out and tossed, even my Japanese rice. Gone. Now all I have is veggie broth at a beautiful 30 calories a cup. The ONLY thing left for me to eat is broth. I feel very happy indeed. See, my mood is better now! WOOHOO! Maybe I'll go buy some nori (seaweed) and put that in the broth so it can be Asian-ish. Nori is low calorie. The only thing left on my food shelf in the kitchen is veggie broth cubes, a tin of sauerkraut and 3 boxes of Japanese tea and a box of earl grey tea. Oh and some fast rise yeast, but I can't eat that.

I wish to GOD that I never ever had to eat again.

I love my new walls. Cleaner, more organized. More pink. More pink is always a good thing.